Start Spreadin' The News...

(a/k/a 'The Story Of My On Again, Off Again, NYC Weekend')

So every year, my company sends us to New York City for a sort of company picnic/party. I had such a great time last year that I HAD to bring my son to this year's extravaganza (the company pays for our airfare, hotel, etc., but we have to pay for our own family).

After weeks of fiddling with schedules, calling around for cheap airfares, etc., I finally score a good deal for my son. We even sleep over at the airport-connected hotel here in Toronto the night before, because our flight was leaving at 8 a.m. (because it's a cross-border flight, we have to be at the airport 2 hours in advance). This turned out to be a very wise decision indeed.

At 11 p.m. that night (Friday night, while we were sleeping at the hotel), I got word from American Airlines that our flight was cancelled the next morning because of "weather concerns". Which was really odd, because Toronto and NYC's weather is usually pretty similar, so what weather problem could they be talking about? Turns it out it was raining cats and dogs in Manhattan, and the airline couldn't place us on a flight until SUNDAY, which meant we would have had to miss the picnic, not to mention my hotel reservations.

After speaking with the American Airlines rep for about 30 minutes, we discover that I can be transferred to a Continental Airlines flight. Two problems (a) it flies to Newark, NJ instead of Laguardia in NYC and (b) it leaves at 6:30 a.m. The first problem wasn't huge; I've flown into Newark many times before, and the time difference getting into the city is negligible. The second problem was a bit bigger; it meant I'd have to wake up at 3:30, and get my son up at 4!

I decided I'd do it. I really didn't want to give up the party, plus I usually LOVE the NYC hotels my company puts us up at. So I set my alarm for 3:30.

The next morning is a bit of a hassle, as my son does NOT want to wake up and because he's three, I can't really explain to him the problem here. He reluctantly comes along, and by 5:45, we're checked in, past customs and ready to fly. The flight is pleasant enough; it was on a small jet with no more than 50 people aboard (which I didn't mind at all), and my son took his first airplane ride quite well.

We arrive in Newark at about 8, and after a bit of confusion, collect our bags and find the car service that was to pick us up. Once we arrive at the hotel, though, we have a new problem: they won't check us in until 3 p.m. I plead with them saying my son is dead tired, and it's a good three hours until the picnic even STARTS, but to no avail. So, having run out of options, I get comfy in the hotel lobby chair and my son falls asleep on me for an hour or so. Fun, fun, fun!

Oh, and did I mention the weather is just fine by now? It had rained heavily the night before, but I still don't see why they had to cancel the flight in advance...

Once he's had a bit of rest, we head over to my offices on Park Avenue and wait for a chartered bus to take us to the picnic. This goes pretty smoothly, and within 45 minutes, we're enjoying ourselves at the picnic. I'll give full credit to my company: they KNOW how to put on an awesome party. Food everywhere you look; tons of live music; all kinds of games, exhibits and even a proper midway set up for the little ones! My son truly had a blast. That was really important to me.

We leave the party between 4 and 5 p.m., stuffed to our ears and worn out by the sun (aside from being a bit humid, it was perfect outdoor weather in NYC), and go to check into our hotel. I have never been so disappointed in my life.

Now usually, my company hooks me up with some of the nicest hotels in town: The Drake, The St. Regis, etc. Even when I'm travelling elsewhere, it's first class all the way. So while I've definitely been spoiled, it didn't make the accomodations any better.

This place, The Melrose, was one of the tiniest, most antiquated, dumpiest hotels I've ever been to. My bedroom was larger than the room here, I kid you not. I have been to flea-bitten, non-temperature controlled motel rooms that were a better deal. I have half a mind to write a letter of complaint, and I don't do that all that often.

After assessing the situation for twenty minutes, I decide to take my son out to Times Square for some fun (no, not THAT kind of fun, you perverts; Times Square has been cleaned up for years now). We head to the HUGE Toys R Us, and he is even more impressed than at the picnic. An hour or so there and we're both exhausted and decide to hunt for some chow. On his recommendation, we ended up at McDonalds, which was fine by me.

A little more shopping and we head to sleep in our broom close...er, room, calling it a night after an exhausting day. Believe it or not, the little guy wakes up at six a.m. the next day, raring to go! WOW!!!

I let him play with his new toys for a while as daddy takes a longer catnap till seven, then we're off in search of breakfast. HoJo hits the spot quite nicely (we were on a budget, this weekend, see....) and then I notice my son is coming down with a case of the sniffles. So I figure, I'll just head into a drugstore and end of problem, right? WRONG!

We couldn't find one ANYWHERE! I kept asking for directions, and we would walk six, seven blocks, only to find something that was closed on Sundays. ARGH! Finally, we headed back to Times Square, where I found a 24-hour Duane Reade that was open. This was after a good two hours of searching, though. After a quick lunch at an unnamed pizza joint and some DVD/videogame shopping, I tell my son we're going to The Disney Store. There was this huge one last summer, and I was determined to let my son explore it, even IF we were flat broke by this point.

A loooooooong cab ride later (because of street delays from the Pride Parade), and we find the Disney Store. Closed. Until October 2004, when it will re-open again. I felt like the Clark Griswold character in the first Vacation movie when they got to Wally World. My son took it in stride, though. At least he got to watch a parade (umm...err....)

We took in a (free) museum exhibit presented by Sony Wonder (which killed an hour, if nothing else), then headed back to our crappy hotel (as Dave Barry calls it, The Total Lack Of Quality Inn). I called the car service to pick us up a bit early, and with some luck, we caught an early flight back to Toronto (initially, we had a flight that wouldn't get us home much before 10:30 p.m., two hours past my son's bedtime). We got home by 7 instead.

Bottom line - my son had an AMAZING time in New York, which is what I really wanted. I enjoyed the picnic itself, and otherwise the trip was just mediocre to bad. But considering the costs (I spent maybe $450 the entire weekend; INCLUDING his $300 airfare!), it wasn't bad at all.