Move Hard With A Vengeance

Maybe this move is getting to me, or maybe it's because I've been sick with the flu for the past few days. Either way, I had the most bizarre dream last night. I RARELY, RARELY ever remember my dreams, so I just had to get this one down in writing before I forget it...

It starts with me on moving day. No biggie because I've been thinking about that a lot in the last few weeks. But it's not the move for my wife, son and I - it's my entire family. And as a result, there are thousands and thousands of boxes stacked in what appears to be the lobby of a large office building.

I ask my father what boxes I should take to his truck (though it would have to be a damn large truck to pack all that stuff), he tells me and my brother to pick up any boxes with the letters 'H' 'D' and 'S' written on the top. I wasn't sure the significance of those letter until I remember this morning that 'HDS' is a computer function I run sometimes at work, so I'm guessing that's where it came from...

So I start looking for these boxes, can't find any, and mention this to my father. He gets on the phone to someone (who ends up being some evil-looking villian sitting in a crane outside the building) and asks where the `H' 'D' and 'S' boxes are... the internal camera filming my dream zooms in my dad who screams "Oh Shit!!!" just in time for a missile to shoot through one wall of the building, killing hundreds.

From this point on, it turns into an action-adventure film, even with Terminator-style music in the background (great, so my dreams have soundtracks now!). For some unknown reason, even more bizarre than why someone would try to sabotage my family's move, my dad and I decide to flee to the basement of the building. No idea where my brother went from this point on....

I have my one line of action-movie dialogue for the entire dream when I say "Looks like we picked a bad day to move!" in a Bruce Willis-esque smirk. I swear I'm not making this stuff up!

So, once in the basement, we're attacked by some woman riding an ATV who throws black liquid at us, knocking both my father and I unconcious.Could this be the end of our non-heroes???

Not quite. We both awaken, unharmed, and with actor Jack Black as an ally. No, I have no idea why 'Jack Black', though he's clearly the biggest star power in this film so far.

The door to the basement opens (with no one guarding it or anything) and so we start our escape -- me, my father and Jack Black. Jack is eventually killed when we try to escape up a ramp/corridor-y thing that I can only compare to the ramp that connects to various levels at SkyDome. My dad and I are near the top of the ramp when we see another villian riding an ATV. She goes to shoot us, but doesn't have a gun. Then she shrugs and drives off. Huh?

"Two hours of thrilling action!" raves Joel Siegel, Good Morning America

And that's basically it. I open the door and we're back at the lobby, which has been destroyed but is inexplicably villian-free. I see my son waiting for me by the stairs and give him a big hug, and... that's kind of it.

If anyone out there is in to translating dreams, I would LOVE to know if that means anything (other than, of course, that terrorists are planning to sabotage my move).