Latest ITR

O Canada!

Did you know those wacky Canadians celebrate the Fourth of July on July 1? Must be the metric system, or something. Regardless, a nation's birthday is an opportunity not just to drink and blow things up. It's an excuse to make lists of your country's greatest citizens. Sadly, we all know how well that turned out when we Americans tried it, so maybe we oughta give it a rest and see how the Canucks do. Specifically, the Canadian Bulldog is celebrating the holiday by issuing a special list (complete with Limited Edition Trading Cards!) of Canada's Top 10 Wrestling Personalities Ever. EVER! Including at least one notably hot babe. Check out the latest Inside the Ropes.

Stu Stone Plug of the Day

Check out this interview from a Seattle radio station with Stu and his man Jamie Kennedy. Only funny (to me) because of Stu's run-in and subsequent takeover of the entire conversation.

Random Rumblings....

Hey there... been back for a couple of days now. I gotta say, I love New York (somebody should use that as a slogan), but the heat was just unbearable. Got to stay in one of my favorite hotels anywhere -- The Drake Swissotel on Park Avenue. Did the Times Square thing, toured around midtown, some shopping, etc. and generally had a blast with my little one.

Sounds like I missed one helluva PPV on Sunday... but I probably would have been bitter about it anyways because I predicted so many of the matches wrong. I DID, however, watch Raw last night, and it was done quite well. And as anyone in the OO chat room can attest to, I called Hogan as the third partner a good hour before anyone else!

Still on wrestling, I picked up a few DVD's I'd never seen before: A best of Booker T (from back in his GWF years), some random collection of old-school 80's and 90's stuff and a documentary called "Backyard Criminals". I have a few DVD reviews on backlog (including a Road Warriors one I sent to The Rick about a week ago), but I'm sure I'll eventually get to some of these too.

And finally.... I feel like Randy Orton with his RNN updates, but the Letters From A Nut Book is now DEFINITELY 90 percent finished. Just a bit of typesetting stuff and a few illustrations to nail down... but we're now at the 120 page mark or so. Keep watching this space for further shilling in the future, but I cannot BELIEVE just how many emails I have now that they're all in one document.

That's about it from here - a pretty cool ITR coming out for Thursday. Stay tuned!

Off To Gotham

Headed out to New York City for a couple of days. Been looking forward to this weekend for a while -- our annual company picnic. My son loves it, and its always a good time.

Enjoy Vengeance!

The Onion

You know, it's been quite a while since I've gone over to the site and had a really good laugh (don't get me wrong; it's never terrible, just they've been kind of flat lately), but you really owe it yourself to check out this week's edition. Some tremendously-hilarious shit here...

Latest ITR

It Begins...

You think you know everything, don't you? You think you completely understand the origins of Hulk-a-Mania? You think you know how a mere mortal man became a superhero? You think you've danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? Well, Pedro, it's time to go to school. Because the true story of Hulk Hogan's origins is shrouded and mystery, and will only emerge in the weeks to come... in the form of a WWE Films Movie Release. The Canadian Bulldog's Man in Hollywood has the full report, and then Bulldog himself has PPV Preview, EXCLUSIVE~! scoops about TNA, and a whole hell of a lot more in the very latest Inside the Ropes.

Movie Review - Batman Begins

I'm going to probably write one of the only reviews out there (from the ones I've read, anyways) that didn't exactly love this one. Good, but certainly not the best film ever. (EVER!!!)

Now, I'm not one of these people who actually liked the direction the franchise has gone in -- I mean, Batman Forever? Puh-lease! But I still think Michael Keaton is the best Batman out there -- he was able to marry the dark side with a healthy sense of humor. Still, it's not like I think Christian Bale has done a bad job here.

(Minor spoilers below)


First, what I liked: the premise was well done. It was certainly about time they got back to Batman's evil roots, and explained why he is what he is. So the first hour or so where they built his character was cool. Michael Caine as Alfred was just perfect - he really built up the part and explained why Alfred stayed at Bruce Wayne's side as he always did. And I even thought that by letting Detective Gordon in on the whole deal early was a nice touch. Morgan Freeman was, well, Morgan Freeman, and that's never a bad thing.

Now, in all fairness, I actually dozed off during part of the climactic scene (where Liam Neeson returned) and I'm sure that this may have affected my enjoyment. You'd never see, say, Ebert and Roeper pulling something like that. But, really, I think it just started getting too complicated for its own good that point. Not that I didn't understand or anything, just that it was too much information.

And what did they sacrifice because of that? A decent amount of development for Cillian Murphy's character. One of my favorite things from any of the Batman films was how they introduced us to the villian in a slow, burning fashion, which explains why they are the way they are. Sure, they don't need to go back to The Scarecrow's very beginning if he's been doing this for a while, but allowing more time to see what makes him tick would be nice. Yes, they did have SOME of that, but not enough. Hell, we got to see almost as much screen time for the corrupt cop who had a bit part.

Finally, I didn't like Katie Holmes at ALL in that role. Or, well, any role, but it's not like I can't stand her on general principle or anything. She doesn't bring any emotion to the role, and every time she goes to say something important, it looks she's about to laugh. Not good.

So, overall, I did not think this was a bad film. It just didn't meet my expectations based on all the hype I'd heard beforehand.

Useless Game Of The Day

Some fun, if not confusing, games from the Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy film...

Depressing....

Was watching that new "Hit Me Baby One More Time" show (I'm a big 80's music freak), specificially to see Howard Jones perform. HoJo was one of my favorite 80's performers -- I've probably seen him in a concert a dozen times over the years, and honestly, I think he is one of the most talented musicians out there. Even some of his more adult contemporary songs that he wrote in later years, I'm blown away by.

Anyways, so it comes time for her to perform his song and the guy looks like he should be selling mutual funds, not singing pop music. Of course, it HAS been more than 20 years since his music was popular, but that doesn't make ME feel any younger.

Latest ITR

ReunionMania!

ECW wasn't the only promotion running reunion shows last weekend! Baron von Raschke and the stars of the AWA got together to the delight of literally dozens of fans! Und dat is all ze people need to know! Actually, no it isn't: as a matter of fact, in addition to all the info from the AWA's historic revival, you also need to know all the latest news and rumors about the WWE Draft Lottery. And you need to collect the next set of ITR Trading Cards. Canadian Bulldog has all this gOOdness and much more in Inside the Ropes.

Cool Flash Animation Game

Check out the awesome Barn Game With Platforms From Space -- created by our old friend Operation Retard.

Raw Satire, Part Deux

Here's my second and final attempt at entering Matt Hocking's alternate Raw-niverse. Let me know what you think!

Programming Notes

As I return my mini-vacation, a few notes for this week. I will be doing part 2 of my guest shot on Raw Satire tomorrow (only on Online Onslaught, though, because in kind of a sad turn, The W has decided to discontinue its "guest columns" forum). I hope to be writing an ITR as well, though I may not have time to bring it to fruition ahead of Thursday. And I've also got a DVD review of that Road Warriors DVD (see two posts below) almost finished, and another multi-DVD review, also about 80 percent done.

On top of all that, I've got the book in (probably) its finishing stages over the next month or so, so I haven't forgotten about that project, either.

Could be a busy few weeks for me here....

ECW One Night Stand Thoughts

This was just a fun night out, plain and simple. In the theater we were watching the show at, we sat right behind WWE Canada President Carl DeMarco, whom we were trying to infuriate with comments like "You Screwed Bret!" and "De Marco Sucks!". Unfortunately, he didn't sell our catcalls at all.

In any event, I found that the matches were almost secondary to the nostalgia factor, which was fine. I think that's how you have present something like this; you can't pretend that the company has been in business all this time.

Briefly, the Mike Awesome-Masato Tanaka match was EASILY match of the night, and I can't help but think Mike's performance will land him a spot on the WWE roster again (perhaps in the Cabinet?). The Dudleyz-Tommy Dreamer/Sandman came in second for me; it was so ridiculously overbooked that it worked. Eddie Guerrero-Chris Benoit was fine, but they almost have to outdo themselves to get a higher rating these days. The two cruiserweight matches were fast-paced and fun, but nothing overly compelling over similar bouts. Nice to see Sabu back in action and as crazy as ever. And while Chris Jericho-Lance Storm was a tad underwhelming, I was at least happy Storm got the nod in what might be his final match.

Paul Heyman and Rob Van Dam's shoots were surreal, in that they both said what everyone was thinking, but what no one ever thought would appear on a WWE PPV. Joel Gertner was hilarious in his two brief appearances. On commentary, I wasn't crazy about the teaming of Joey Styles and Mick Foley, but I suppose it could have been far worse.

As far the invasion angle went.... it was well done. You could tell the ECW faithful to kick the shit out of Bradshaw, Bischoff, Angle & company, so having them appear numerous times was a given. Should they have had Austin as the guy who eventually orchestrated the attack on the invaders? Oh hell yeah! It's not as though Stone Cold was never with ECW or anything, and his appearance gave the show a nice push without seemingly overly "corporate".

So yeah, this one of the most anticipated PPV's in a number of years, and it delivered as advertised. Definitely one to go out of your way to see.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh... What A Rush!

Unexpectedly found the new Road Warriors DVD while on vacation this weekend in Toronto (and yes, I live in Toronto; was kind of a vacation-on-a-budget as my son and I played tourist in the downtown heart of our fine city.)

Back to the DVD: It totally rocks. Has to rank up there with the Flair, Hogan and Benoit ones as far as the actual biography portion goes. It's interesting because its not a WWE-driven story, even if they have all the usual WWE suspects TELLING the story (with quite a few outsiders thrown in for fun).

I'm actually planning on writing a full-blown review on this (which I didn't realize was actually a 2-disc set - bonus!), but the bottom line on it is: go buy this thing right now. Well worth the money and then some...

Turning The Tables....

Matt Hocking was kind enough to guest-write this week's Inside The Ropes. Here's the result:

Raw Satire

Well, as promised/threatened in last week's column, I have taken over Raw Satire duties for Matt Hocking, while he's going to do this week's ITR. Here's my contribution to the cause -- please let me know what you think....

Raw Satire (The W)
Raw Satire (Online Onslaught)

The more things change...

Came across a column I wrote almost 11 years ago (October 6, 1994, to be precise) in my college newspaper. Thought I'd reprint a portion of it today.

Sure, the writing isn't as polished as I'd like to think I can do these days, but the humor and wrestling elements are at least in place. This was written as baseball and hockey were talking about lockouts, and especially with the NHL situation still looming, seems kind of appropriate to reprint today:

(Continued below)


I, for one, have grown tired of going to day-to-day waiting for the latest labor dispute to be settled. The athletes and owners are nothing but a bunch of crybabies. I've given up and decided to actively pursue the one spot that doesn't mess with all this garbage: professional wrestling.

Stop laughing! I mean it! You'd never see Hulkster or Macho Man go on strike! And where else can you see "sport" and entertainment combined in one package? Imagine how much more exciting it would be if all sports were like wrestling:

For beginners, we all know that all sports have good guys (Joe Carter, Wayne Gretzky) and bad guys (Bob Probert, Charles Barkley). Why not exploit it? Couldn't you just see Albert Belle smashing a catcher over the head with his corked bat? How about a football coach distracting the referee so his men could acquire a very personal foul?

What about interviews? I can't tell you how many times I've changed the channel during the white-bread responses of a Paul Molitor ("I think we really have a good club this year..."). BO-RING! If the athletes gave interviews a la the WWF, you could bet that fans would be on the edge of their seats when they heard "Whatcha gonna do - when Andre Agassi runs wild over youuuuuuuuu!" prior to a tennis game.

The violence level in sports would skyrocket if they decided to copy the mentality of the "squared circle". Don King would be positively drooling if he could figure out a way to promote Australian Rules Tag Team Boxing. How about if hockey goons Tie Domi and Louie DeBrusk opted not to brawl on the ice - but instead took their battles inside the confines of a 15-foot steel cage?

Of course, if all sports took after pro wrestling, the illegalities might start to folllow. Golfers would constantly be disqualified for hair-pulling. One could only imagine what Joe Bowen would say while broadcasting on The FAN:

"Well, it looks like the Maple Leafs are about to defeat the Whalers and... wait. What's this? The Detroit Red Wings have stormed the ice! They're looking to settle the score from last week! They've sneak-attacked the Leafs! IT'S ALL OVER!"

"It's only against the rules if you caught, Bowen," guest commentator Jesse "The Body" Ventura would likely comment.

Okay, perhaps a Pearl Harbor attack from a rival team is a little farfetched, but sports would be much more entertaining to watch. Most importantly, there would be no strikes, no lockouts, no labor disputes...

After all, someone from the Players Association could always bodyslam the commissioner if negotiations weren't going well.

Movie Review - Cinderella Man

This wasn't as much a movie about boxing as it was about the great depression. But on that front, this is probably the best film about that era I've seen.

(continued below)

I'm definitely a fan of Russell Crowe, his range is just fantastic. This was easily his best performance since A Beautiful Mind (not that I've seen him in a ton of other films since then). Renee Zellwegger, I can't stand, but I didn't think it was actually HER playing his wife until the credits rolled (I thought it was another actress, whose name escapes me at the moment). She wasn't great, but passable anyways.

But this one is definitely more about the writing than the actors. Based on a true-life story of James J. Braddock, the "Bulldog of Bergen" (no relation), who was a top light heavyweight boxing contender until he embarked on a losing streak around the late-20's. The film essentially picks up from that point, after he's barred from boxing and forced to do just about anything to feed his family and pay his electricity bill.

His comeback towards the end is clearly the best part, as it almost seems to be good to be true (and if it wasn't true, I'd be highly skeptical). It's truly inspiring to see how Braddock inspired others through the depression, and this film conveys that phenomenon well. Kudos to Ron Howard for bringing that aspect together.

The one criticism - at well over 2 hours, this was just too long. Not that the film didn't keep my interest, but I can't think of too many films where I've thought that 2 hours wasn't enough time to tell a story and bring it all home.

Still, I'd definitely recommend seeing it.

Was it something I said?

Was just checking the hit count stats for this blog yesterday, and I'm amazed to find out that there was more than SEVEN TIMES the normal readership yesterday!

Wow. Unbelievable. Yes, I realize I cheapened it a bit by sending you all here in a link from my column, but that's not the first time I've pulled that stunt, and its never quite had results like that.

Anyways, thank you for reading (or at least being sent here somehow)!!!

Latest ITR

Attention, Collectors!

Oh, sure the Canadian Bulldog has EXCLUSIVE news about the upcoming ECW PPV, and lots of other Important Current Events. He is, afterall, OO's Intrepid Investigative Reporter, and he'll do anything for a scOOp. But this week, Bulldog is gonna scratch you where you itch another way: with Series #1 of an EXCLUSIVE set of Trading Cards! All your favorite wrestling superstars will be represented. Bulldog has even, for reasons that I guess will make sense next week, made sure to include More Kane. So get the first 5 collectors cards (authenticated as being in Near Mint Condition by the owner of the Android's Dungeon) by checking the latest Inside the Ropes.


Inside The Ropes (Online Onslaught)
Inside The Ropes (The W)

Letters From A Nut BONUS MATERIAL

Okay... this one isn't wrestling related. But I still think it's a good one.

I get TONS of spam e-mail at work, and I wanted to respond to one. This actually started two months ago. Every time I think she's finished with me, she comes back with another response. Anyways, her letter is first, followed by my response, and so on:



The Jane Mupesa Files

From:Jane Mupesafamily2001 4/ 5 8:45
Subject: From Mrs Jane
Attachment(s): None Page 1/ 4

Dear Sir / Madam,

In a brief I am Mrs Jane Mupesa, wife to Ndoga Mupesa of Chiweshe ward in Muzarabani, Mashonaland Central province, who was allegedly killed in cold blood on 5th April 2001 by alleged Zanu PF militias and war veterans for supporting the (Mr Morgan Tsvangirai) Movement for Democratic Change, an opposition party to the tyranny government of President Robert Mugabe.I have been thrown into a state of utter confusion, frustration and hopelessness by the present civilian administration; I have been subjected to physical and psychological torture by the security agents in the country.

As a widow that is so traumatized, I have lost confidence with anybody within the country. You must have heard over the media reports and the internet on the recovery of various huge sums of money deposited by my husband in different security firms abroad, some companies willingly give up their secrets and disclosed our money confidently lodged there and many out rightly blackmail us. When my husband was alive I used to move funds running into millions of United States Dollars to Brazil/Lebanon and other Arab Countries.

However, on the eve of my husband's death on 5th April 2001, he gave me the sum of US$39m(million) in cash to move to Lebanon ,but immediately my husband died I moved the funds to a Security Firm through a diplomatic courier service where the fund is right now.

The funds have been in the Finance Firm since 2001.Because of the restriction placed on my family by the Zimbabwean Government, I Simply cannot travel to secure the funds from the Security Firm where this said amount was deposited, all you need to do is to furnish me with the requested information's bellow immediately;

1. Full names
2. Contact address
3. Telephone and fax numbers
4. Location

Please contact me immediately so that I will give you the contact of my
Lawyer for more details and to expedite action.
Alternative E-Mail address:jane_ndogamupesa2001@voila.fr

Mrs Jane Mupesa
Muzaraban-Zimbabwe

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Mrs. Jane Mupesa,

My deepest condolences on the death of your husband Ndoga Mupesa of Chiweshe ward in Muzarabani, Mashonaland Central province. Now admit it -- you made it up part of that name, didn't you? I mean, I could have said that my spouse Zheshesh Wuzuwoozle lived in Ahitohoney Jerzscheread, located in Lower West Ghandarozod, and you wouldn't know the difference. Am I right?

Anyways... OF COURSE I have heard about his death through the numerous media and Internet reports, as you've suggested. They even had a bulletin on it as I was watching television last night. Can you believe that? I was in the middle of watching wrestling, and then, bam, they interrupt to tell me about the death of Ndoga Mupesa of Chiweshe ward in Muzarabani, Mashonaland Central province. So now I have no idea what happened after the referee got knocked out. Thanks a lot!

I understand that on the eve of your husband's death, he gave you the sum of US$39m(million) in cash to move to Lebanon. So what's the problem? Enjoy it! You're worried about the Zimbabwean government restricting your travel? Hopefully, they don't monitor your email messages too. Anyways, just hire someone like Fed-Ex to get you the dough. They'll have it to you by the next business day. Then you don't have to go through all the trouble of getting my personal contact information, then placing the $$$ in my bank account, then travelling to Canada to murder me (I'm assuming that's the crux of your evil plot, right?)

Anyways, if that doesn't work for you, how about this: I recently killed my spouse, the evil dictator Ghasiniwue Niethwerasponn the Seventh, who lived in Yasterwininstein County, Utah. She took out an insurance policy for -- as luck would have it -- US$39m (million). But wouldn't you know it -- the damned Tazariennneiunsom government won't let me withdraw the money unless I contact an obscure stranger by email. So if you take my money, I'll take yours. Deal?

Yours truly,
Resheonwnin McUstinoveriwehjskin Jr.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

From:Mrs Jane Mupesa 4/ 6 8:45
Subject: From Mrs Jane
Attachment(s): 16521058.htm <6k>
Page 1/ 6

Dear Resheonwnin McUstinoveriwehjskin Jr,

Sir,

Thank you very much for your devoted willingness to assist me to secure my funds which was deposited by my late husband Mr Ndoga Mupesa with a security company in Europe, I will like to let you know that since I left Zimbabwe it has not been easy for me and my children as we were confined in the refugee camp here in Cotonou, Republic of Benin for our dear life.

I do not have a free access to telephone calls,but i will try and call you,

For the claim of the funds from the Finance House in Europe, I would like you to work hand in hand with Barrister Peter T George who is a pastor in my church here and equally a legal practitioner.

You will be required to contact him, As you contact him, he will send you all the neccesary documents concerning the deposited funds and advise you about the steps to take to get the funds from the finance house.

He will equally process a letter of athority or power of attorney on your behalf which is your legal authorisation to claim the funds as the beneficiary.

His contacts are as follows,

BARRISTER P.T.GEORGE ESQ.
TEL +229 40 86 63.MOBILE TEL +37 747 604 406.
EMAIL,ptassociates2002@yahoo.com

Try and contact him and let me know, I will be waiting for your urgent response.

Please kindly forward your family pictures to me as I have forwarded my family pictures to you.

Warm Regards,

Mrs Jane Mupesa.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Mrs. Mupesa,

As per your request, I have contacted Barrister Peter T George and asked him about the money. It was a long-distance call; did you know that? Not a huge deal, I called after 7 p.m. He was pleasant to speak with, but seemed nervous, on edge almost, as if lifting funds from Zimbabwean scam companies wasn't an everyday occurrence.

This is how we left it: he wants YOU to come to Canada and deliver the money to me yourself. His exact words, I believe, were "I'm a lawyer AND a pastor! I can't do both jobs perfectly. Let Mrs. Jane Mupesa do some of the work, for pete's sake!" He may have just been upset about the Pope's recent passing: I couldn't tell.

I checked the travel website priceline.com (they advertise "Name Your Own Price"; perhaps you've seen some of the television commercials with William Shatner?), and these look to be your safest travel options: (A) Via tugboat, which would take approximately six (6) days from Zimbabwe, (B) Hot air balloon or (C) Sneaking into the Canadian border at 3 a.m. (not always recommended).

Let me know how you intend to proceed. I look forward to meeting you once and for all (andalsogettingmycash). Cheers!

-----------------------------------------------------------------

(I am missing an email here from her, from mid-April)
-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dearest Jane (Can I call you Jane? And if I can't, what are you going to do about it?)

Bulldog here. Look, let's cut the crap. You're telling me you're in a refugee camp... and yet you can send e-mail? Quite the posh refugee camp! Me, I got captured in 1998 and they wouldn't even let me have water, but you get Yahoo Mail? How are the caviar lunches and free iPods over there? Must be nice, Mrs. Jane Mupesa. Come on; my ex-wife comes up with better excuses than that!

You should develop a television reality show where ten people live in the same house, and the only way they can leave is by scamming someone into sending along their bank account information. If NBC green-lights that, I want a producer credit....

And I told you in the last email, but obviously you're too STUPID to read it: I called your friend BARRISTER P.T.GEORGE ESQ. already. He told me the real deal here. He sold you out, lady! The scam is up!!!

So here's what's going to happen: I want from you to keep this away from the "tabloids". I want you drop it off at my house TONIGHT (you know where I live; don't pretend you don't!) In return, we'll pretend that this whole phony e-mail conversation never happened. Well, actually, I'll remember this one for a
while; especially the part where I referenced C-3PO about two messages back.

But there will be no further trouble if you follow my instructions. And remember, you have forty-eight hours to find the clock tower . I'm not sure what that means, exactly, but it *sounds* eerie, doesn't it?

Peace, out!
Resheonwnin McUstinoveriwehjskin Jr.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

From:•Mrs Jane Mupesa 6/ 2 9:09
Subject: COMPENSATION.
Attachment(s): 23804175.htm <1k> Page 1/ 3

Dear Resheonwnin McUstinoveriwehjskin Jr,

I'm happy to inform you about my success in getting those funds transferred under the cooperation of a new partner from Paraguay. I am in Paraguay for the investment projects with my own share of the total sum. Mean while, I didn't forget your past efforts and attempts to assist me in transferring those funds despite that it failed us some how and I am sorry for what happened in the past.

Now contact the secretary of my lawyer in Benin her name is Mrs Glory Tinto, and her email address:- glorytinto@yahoo.fr ask her to send you the Bank Draft, total sum of US$800.000.00 which I kept for your compensation for all the past efforts and attempts to assist me in this matter. I appreciated your efforts at that time very much. So feel free and get in touched with his secretary Mrs Glory Tinto and instruct her where to send the amount to you.

Please do let me know immediately you receive it so that we can share the joy after all the suffer ness at that time. At present, I m in Paraguay, meanwhile, with the new partner and we are working in hand to hand in Paraguay to see that the funds are well invest, finally, I had forwarded instruction to the secretar on your behalf to receive the money, so feel free to get in touch with Mrs Glor Tinto, she will send the amount to you without any delay.

Regards,
Mrs Jane Mupeas.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Ms. Mupesa (or is it "Mupeas"? Can't you even spell your own damn name correctly? Moron.),

Thank you for getting back to me about the money I am rightfully owed. Yes, I DID go through a lot of work to try to transfer the funds from wherever your scam is based, and what did it get me? Nothing!!!

So you're in Paraguay now... how's the weather there? Things are okay here in the T-Dot, although I hear it may rain this weekend. I was really hoping to have a picnic or something, but now I'm not going to even attempt it. Don't you hate when that happens? How are the kids?

Anyways, about the dough -- can you not just place it all in a brown paper bag, meet me somewhere, and let's be done with it already! I don't want to deal with banks anymore. I'm sick of these Canadian banks, what with earnings season being
done and all (and what did you think about RBC raising its dividend again? Pretty impressive, huh?) Surely the laws in Paraguay are much more lax than wherever it was you were imprisoned before, no?

All I'm saying is, I don't want to keep emailing other people to get my rightful inheritance of US$800.000.00. It was an inheritance, right? Aren't you the one whose deceased husband was an Uzbekihstani King? Or do I have my shams mixed up again?

I'm sure Mrs. Glory Tinto is helluva person and everything -- I just don't want to deal with yet ANOTHER middleman. Ya dig? Holla back,

Resheonwnin McUstinoveriwehjskin Jr. (a/k/a "Rusty")

2005 WWE Hall of Fame

Just got my hands on the WM21 DVD (It's not available here in Canada yet, but I have my connections). Haven't watched the entire thing yet (I mean, I just saw the PPV not that long ago), but the Hall of Fame section is almost as enjoyable as last year's.

A few observations, continued below:



- Cowboy Bob Orton still has a certain quiet charisma about him, and I still think it would be a great idea to bring him back as Randy's manager.

- Nikolai Volkoff seemed pretty humble. JR, who inducted him, did seem a tad nervous for some reason in his introduction.

- Iron Sheik was UTTERLY HILARIOUS in his acceptance speech. Folks, you have to see this one to believe it.

- Bobby Heenan, even with his voice ravaged by the effects of cancer, is a better talker than most people in the wrestling business today. He introduced Paul Orndorff and did just a fantastic job, even in just three or four minutes.

- Orndorff appeared to be trying way too hard to get over, and came across as being very bitter, especially towards Hogan (I noticed that at Mania too). Let it go already, Mr. Wonderful

- It's hard to separate Jimmy Hart the character from the actual person, especially after reading his lame-ass book. His entire speech sounded identical to a Jimmy Hart promo. At least Jerry Lawler did a nice job setting him up.

- Roddy Piper was hilarious (although I'd already seen it on the Spike TV Special) and coherent, even, in his delivery. Funny how whenever Piper is at a WWE event, he seems to forget his utter hatred he has for the company. Don't get me wrong; Piper is probably my second-favorite wrestler of all time, but he can be a damned hypocrite. Flair, of course, gave him a tremendous send-up.

- Hulk Hogan (which I'd already seen as well) was just perfect and had an amazing reception from the crowd. Entirely as expected.

Crowd notes: Kurt Angle looked like he was having the time of his life, same with Steve Austin. Triple H looked utterly bored sitting there in the front row, and Eric Bischoff seemed pissed off (not sure how much of that was an act, though).

All in all, I'd say this part of the package is worth the price of the DVD alone. Definitely check it out.