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No ITR This Week
Just a quick heads up for the two people who read this blog and (presumably) read my column.... there won't be one this week while ITR goes on hiatus for 'creative re-tooling'.

Actually, it's just that I don't have enough time this week to put a column together, between my work week from hell and my post-move chores (the chores also hailing from hell).

But I DO have a kick-ass idea for next week. Just need some time to work on it...

Useless link of the day

And you thought Tetris was addictive....

Phoneless in Thornhill

Well, the move happened over the weekend, without a hitch. Except for all the hitches, that is. ARGH!!!

It wasn't *too* bad, I suppose. I mean, the movers did everything fairly quickly and didn't break a thing. About 90 % of my apartment has been cleaned out, giving me a solid week to pick the remaining items up and clean a little.

HOWEVER, we are three days into the home and no phone service. That means I can't even access the Internet, except for at work. Thank goodness I have a good cellphone package...

My washer and dryer still aren't working, three weeks after the initial problem was identified. We managed to finally figure out what the problem for why one of the doors wouldn't shut, though there a handful of other `quirks' that I have yet to address.

Anyways, if I'm only online sparingly for the next little while, you'll know why....

The Big Move
It's happening tomorrow. The Canadian Bulldog will finally be a homeowner (though it won't say that on the mortgage).

I'll probably be offline for a few days while we get everything in order.

Wish me luck. I'm scared.....

Latest ITR
You're Firrrrrrredddddd!!!

New 'theme' for Here Comes The Pain

So whenever I create people on the SmackDown games, I always have to have a theme. I don't know why; I'm just weird that way, I suppose.

So far, I've done... 80's wrestlers, WCW guys (as in the worst ones, Big Josh, PN News, etc.), current WWE roster (that's not on the game), movie stars, musicians, deceased wrestlers and Star Wars characters. My most recent theme was classic tag teams and I created (before I got bored with it): Killer Bees, British Bulldogs, Demolition, Hart Foundation, Quebecers, Bushwhackers, The Rockers, Nasty Boys, Bundy & Studd, New Age Outlaws, and a few others.

So my newest theme is 70's/early 80's wrestlers... basically anyone who first showed up pre-WrestleMania 1. So far, I've done decent likenesses of: Pedro Morales, Bruno Sammartino, Jesse Ventura, Superstar Billy Graham, Blackjack Mulligan, Ken Patera, Andre The Giant and Gorilla Monsoon. Any other ideas?

Useless Link Of The Day
What Was The Number One Song The Day You Were Born?

First Brutus, now Jake...

From The Sun newspaper...

WRESTLER Jake ‘The Snake’ Roberts is being prosecuted — for starving his pet python to death.

RSPCA inspectors seized 12-ft Damien after a tip-off he was being neglected at the ex-WWF star’s home in London Colney, Herts.

The Burmese python died days later.

New Yorker Roberts, 50, denies causing unnecessary suffering.

He could be jailed for up to six months.

Are any 80's WWF stars safe?

No Way Out reax
Much like the Royal Rumble show, WWE managed to get the top of the card right while botching the undercard. Not that that's a bad thing -- I'd rather see that than it being the other way around. Still, you missed absolutely nothing if you only started watching when Goldberg made his first appearance.
The crowd in SF sounded dead, dead, dead for most of this. It looked like they were having trouble getting into the arena, but still -- by the time Chavo and Rey were on, they should have been loud enough. That really hurt the overall experience for me.
Still, three very good matches in the CW title match, the triple-threat (although I would have liked to see Kurt cheating to win) and of course the main event.
Long overdue, Eddie is now the WWE champion. Both he and Brock looked especially strong during the entire match -- this was clearly NOT a case of one guy carrying the other to a good match. Good booking all the way around, and how great is it to see both Benoit and Guerrero headed to the co-main events of WrestleMania?
You know who else looked very good last night? Big Show. I'm serious; from his pre-match interview on Heat (which was classic stuff) to his role in the triple-threat and the INSANE Angle Slam he took outside the ring, Show looked amazing. I said it in the OO Year-End Awards and I stand by it: Big Show is the most underrated guy out there. People like to take away from what he does because he's overweight. but I say ever since he jumped ship to SmackDown, Show has been booked tremendously.
Overall, a so-so show (first four matches were beyond awful; last three were quite good) -- but it was worth watching for the Eddie Guerrero-Brock Lesnar match alone.

Useless Link Of The Day
Virtual Knee Surgery
I feel like I know what I'm doing now... I'm going to med school!!!

The Barber, The Butcher, The Subway Collector?
From 1wrestling.com,

Brutus Beefcake (Ed Leslie) caused an Anthrax scare at a Boston subway station when a white powdery substance was found that caused the evacuation of the station where he was working. The substance was found on the counter of a fare booth being manned by Leslie, who later admitted it wasn't Anthrax but was cocaine.
Leslie has been suspended and has checked into rehab.

Wow -- sounds like Beefer is slithering into Jake Roberts territory...

Latest ITR
http://www.onlineonslaught.com/columns/bulldog/20040212.shtml
Special thanks this week to Jeb Tennyson Lund for the interview idea.

Move Hard With A Vengeance

Maybe this move is getting to me, or maybe it's because I've been sick with the flu for the past few days. Either way, I had the most bizarre dream last night. I RARELY, RARELY ever remember my dreams, so I just had to get this one down in writing before I forget it...

It starts with me on moving day. No biggie because I've been thinking about that a lot in the last few weeks. But it's not the move for my wife, son and I - it's my entire family. And as a result, there are thousands and thousands of boxes stacked in what appears to be the lobby of a large office building.

I ask my father what boxes I should take to his truck (though it would have to be a damn large truck to pack all that stuff), he tells me and my brother to pick up any boxes with the letters 'H' 'D' and 'S' written on the top. I wasn't sure the significance of those letter until I remember this morning that 'HDS' is a computer function I run sometimes at work, so I'm guessing that's where it came from...

So I start looking for these boxes, can't find any, and mention this to my father. He gets on the phone to someone (who ends up being some evil-looking villian sitting in a crane outside the building) and asks where the `H' 'D' and 'S' boxes are... the internal camera filming my dream zooms in my dad who screams "Oh Shit!!!" just in time for a missile to shoot through one wall of the building, killing hundreds.

From this point on, it turns into an action-adventure film, even with Terminator-style music in the background (great, so my dreams have soundtracks now!). For some unknown reason, even more bizarre than why someone would try to sabotage my family's move, my dad and I decide to flee to the basement of the building. No idea where my brother went from this point on....

I have my one line of action-movie dialogue for the entire dream when I say "Looks like we picked a bad day to move!" in a Bruce Willis-esque smirk. I swear I'm not making this stuff up!

So, once in the basement, we're attacked by some woman riding an ATV who throws black liquid at us, knocking both my father and I unconcious.Could this be the end of our non-heroes???

Not quite. We both awaken, unharmed, and with actor Jack Black as an ally. No, I have no idea why 'Jack Black', though he's clearly the biggest star power in this film so far.

The door to the basement opens (with no one guarding it or anything) and so we start our escape -- me, my father and Jack Black. Jack is eventually killed when we try to escape up a ramp/corridor-y thing that I can only compare to the ramp that connects to various levels at SkyDome. My dad and I are near the top of the ramp when we see another villian riding an ATV. She goes to shoot us, but doesn't have a gun. Then she shrugs and drives off. Huh?

"Two hours of thrilling action!" raves Joel Siegel, Good Morning America

And that's basically it. I open the door and we're back at the lobby, which has been destroyed but is inexplicably villian-free. I see my son waiting for me by the stairs and give him a big hug, and... that's kind of it.

If anyone out there is in to translating dreams, I would LOVE to know if that means anything (other than, of course, that terrorists are planning to sabotage my move).

Triple H's Bestest Promo Ever

Seriously. Last night's promo that HHH cut on Benoit was one of the best heel speeches I've ever heard him give, especially when he smashed the mic on the table and said something to the effect of `Now wake up! This is reality!'.
He's always been a strong talker, but the interview he gave last night almost made me forget why I hate him so much. It made his match with Benoit feel more important than a usual title defense... which of course it is.
Now, that feeling changed for me when Michaels entered the ring (which, granted, was pretty much expected) and essentially changed the match to a three-way for Mania. I know why they're doing it, but I'm still not sure there should be a one-on-one match instead.
But... at least they have more than a month to let the three-way match take shape, so its not all bad.

The Move
Yes, so I officially started moving to my very first house last week. This may explain my lack of posts here and on various message boards lately.
My typical day now consists of: waking up at 6:30; being at work by 8; handling, oh I'd say 30 house-related problems over the course of the day; then leaving at 5:30; getting home at around 7 to play with my son for about two hours before he goes to sleep, loading up the car with boxes; driving to the new place to drop them off; and (hopefully) getting back home in time for a few hours of sleep.
Fun schedule, let me tell ya.
I'll recount the story of my washer/dryer incident right here in this very Blog, once my lawyer has settled it.
And yes, I'm totally serious....

Latest ITR
http://www.onlineonslaught.com/columns/bulldog/20040205.shtml

Yes, yes, I know -- yet another retro edition.

Curb Your Enthusiasm
Where the HELL has this show been all my life? Or at least during the last few years it's been on the air?
I had heard a few scattered things about the show every once in a while, but nothing like 'you have to see this' etc. Plus, the only station that apparently shows it in Canada is one I don't subscribe to.
So on a whim the other day, I rented the DVD of season one. Let me tell you -- I was BLOWN AWAY by how dark and funny it is.
I don't know how Larry David did it, but he managed to create a show that is actually more entertaining than Seinfeld, and on the surface, it appears to only have a fraction of the effort put into it.
So now I just need to know: how can I get ahold of the other seasons, apart from waiting for them to be released on DVD?
Anyone?