eXTReMe Tracker Canadian BullBLOG: 04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Review - "605 The Reunion" PPV

So with nothing better to do last night, I ordered this one up, hoping that this would be the next "Heroes of Wrestling" in terms of laugh-out-loud comedy. The good/bad news? It wasn't.

The "605" by the way, refers to the 6:05 start time for WCW Saturday Night on the Superstation years and years ago; unfortunately, they couldn't use anything with a WCW name for legal reasons. So in other words, a bunch of semi-retired guys and people that TNA hasn't (or in two cases, hadn't yet) picked up. Sounded like a train-wreck waiting to happen on paper. Oh, and this took place from the Hard Rock Cafe in Universal Studios, Florida, so I was really hoping for some "TNA Idiot Fanboy" participation.

First thing, the commentary was VERY good for something like this, well exceeding what I expected. Lance Russell hasn't lost a step from his WCW Worldwide days, including his patented "Therrrrrrrrre he goes" comments, etc. Jim Cornette was on top of his game, even if his jokes are as stale as the Jerry Lawler joke book. The other two, Ron Niemi and Corey Macklin, weren't great but weren't terrible, either.

The producers of this show were smart in that they put the shittiest matches on first, and kept them super-short. Absolutely nothing wrong that formula, if you have two work with aging wrestling legends to begin with... Oh, and I'd be remiss if I didn't mention the opening featured some of the skankier, lesser-known Nitro Girls.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan vs. Nikolai Volkoff (with Iron Sheik)

Hey, since when did Nikolai ever work for WCW? Sheik and Volkoff are doing the foreign terror gimmick, yet Nikolai is wearing his USA/Russia flag jacket, and Shiekie has his WWE Hall of Fame T-Shirt on. This match is over in just a couple of minutes, thankfully. Duggan won. Hooooooooooooo!

Rick Steiner vs. Mr. Jones

Jones is Virgil, though I guess they can't announce him by any of his myriad nicknames. Yet the ring announcer (David Penzer) still calls him Virgil. Sweet! I should point out that, for old times sake, Doug Dillenger is head of security, and the referees are Earl and Brian Hebner. Anyways, Steiner (wearing a T-Shirt the entire match) wins with a clothesline in like two minutes. Again, the right decision here.

Koko B. Ware vs. Disco Inferno

Anyone else remember this classic WCW feud? Yeah, me neither. Disco looks pretty much the same, while Koko has green hair, an airbrushed "Frankie" T-Shirt, a white jacket, his High Energy taxi sweatpants and white gloves, quite the fashion statement. Cornette comments that Koko probably ate Frankie - hey at least they're having fun with out of shape some of these guys are. Koko wins in another short-ish match, though the crowd is into this one, to be fair.

Superfly Jimmy Snuka vs. Greg Valentine (with Jimmy Hart)

Pre-match, Hart, Valentine and some Test-wannabe named DNA have an interview in which Hart claims that "DNA is the newest member of our brand-new organization!" Huh? And Jimmy Hart is wearing a baseball cap, a sure sign that The Mouth of the South's hairline is going North. Anyways, after all that, DNA doesn't accompany Valentine to the ring. Did he, like, get lost in the 10 seconds between the promo and the ring entrance?

An okay match, and both are in okay shape, but nothing special. The finish was kind of screwed up, though, as the referee (and then security guards) stop 'Fly from splashing Jimmy Hart, and then the match just kind of ends. What the fuck? So after all that, DNA comes out and points at Snuka, as if that match is EVER going to take place (or another PPV by these guys). Oh, and shouldn't they be calling this 11:30 The Reunion, considering most of these have Saturday Night's Main Event rematches?

Eddie Colon (with Carlos Colon) vs. Vampiro

Eddie is the son of Carlos who isn't Carlito, though I can see some facial similarities. This match truly embodies WCW. Oh, wait, it doesn't. Still... you know what? This was a very good match at times -- both Eddie (whom I'd never seen wrestle before) and Vampiro had their A-Game on. Vampiro won. Oh, and Eddie came out to Chavo Guerrero's old music -- I guess Jimmy Hart kept the rights to a lot of his old songs, as they're in full force here...

Jake The Snake Roberts vs. Kamala (with Friday)

They show the classic Memphis intro video for Kamala (although without the awesome "KIMALA!" voiceover. Kamala still looks exactly like he did 20 years ago. Jake, not so much. Cornette comments that Jake has lost weight and is in great shape? Time to get new specs, Corny. Well, he DOES look better than Heroes of Wrestling, and appears to be less drunk/stoned than from that fiasco. Nothing special here. Kamala loses by countout, fleeing the ring when the snake came out of the bag. Yeah, okay. Oh, and this was another SNME rematch, for those keeping score at home.

Bruno Sammartino comes out next to thank the crowd and LORD is he looking old. Then Dory Funk and Mike Graham, who thank Sammartino profusely for coming to this show. Then J.J. Dillon comes out with David Flair and Tully Blanchard (who likes like the 60 year old next door neighbor who's always working on his lawn; his hair is now a grey horseshoe). This sets up:

Dory Funk and Mike Graham (with Bruno Sammartino) vs. David Flair and Tully Blanchard (with J.J. Dillon)

Yeah, I have very little to say about this match. I mean, it wasn't horrible given that the average age in the ring here is 83. But it was nothing special either. Sammartino wallops Dillon at the end, and the faces (really old faces) get the win.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kanyon

Hey, an actual WCW match at the WCW reunion!! Its actually a decent brawl, going in and out of the ring. Both guys could still put on a decent show in either of the big two. This went on slightly long (maybe 15 minutes) but it wasn't bad. DDP won with the diamond cutter.

Post-match, both guys are exhausted and Page cuts a "shoot" promo, saying to Kanyon "I heard this rumor about you. I gotta know - are you gay? Not that there's anything wrong with that" I swear - that's pretty close to how he put it! Real sensititive, Page. You couldn't have waited till you guys got backstage to ask him that if you "had" to know? Anyways, Kanyon looks like he's going to cry, and then finally admits to the two people who still care about this that yes, he IS the "first openly gay athlete who's still active and fought Diamond Dallas Page at the 605 Reunion PPV" or something dumb like that. DDP calls him "the toughest gay SOB he's ever met" or something lame like that and they raise each others arms. The crowd kind of boos. Dumb, dumb, dumb.

Bullet Bob, Steve and Brad Armstrong (with Jim Cornette) vs. Dennis Condrey, Bobby Eaton and Stan Lane (with Bobby Heenan)

Another WCW classic! I didn't even know Heenan and Cornette were feuding; guess I don't watch enough ROH.... Anyways, this one is decent but a little long. Heenan, who looks like he REALLY doesn't want to be there tonight, tosses the tennis racket into the ring to give the 400-year-old Bullet the win over the Ancient Express. Ehhh.

Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Hey, another LEGIT WCW match, although not really what you'd want a main event to be. Both guys do mic work to open things up. Mistake! Steiner has unknown woman with him who never even gets introduced. This one is about as good as you'd expect from Steiner and Bagwell - again, definitely not main-event material. Steiner wins in just a few minutes after submitting to the Steiner Recliner. Hey, it was better than Bagwell/Booker T; I'll give it that...

Post-match, Steiner invited unknown valet into the ring, then HE leaves and she's about to get clobbered by Bagwell when the show suddenly goes off the air. Now THAT part reminded me of Heroes of Wrestling.

Would I recommend this PPV? No, simply put. But credit to the producers for avoided a Heroes of Wrestling scale disaster. If this promotion "World Wrestling Legends" puts on some more shows, it wouldn't be the absolute worst thing in the world.


Friday, April 28, 2006

Latest..... Wrestling With Literature?

Here's a new column idea I've been kicking around for an idea. Check it out - let me know what you think....


Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Latest TWS

Experience The True Wrestling Story of Samoa Joe.


Monday, April 24, 2006

Feelin' Cerealicious!

Offbeat story of the day: There's a new eatery in the food court below where I work that sells nothing but cereal and "gourmet" peanut butter sandwiches. Seriously! I have a copy of their menu right here, and that's all they advertise.

Even though I don't usually eat breakfast, and I try (and often fail) to bring my own lunch to work, this place got my attention for some reason. Perhaps its because I have the eating habits of a six year-old (no, really. I do.), or perhaps the smell of peanut butter and Count Chocula was too much for one man to resist. But today I had my lunch at "Cerealicious".

I just figured I'd have a plain old peanut butter sandwich. Not very adventurous, I'll grant you that, and for the price to have someone make me a sandwich, I could have gone to the bagel shop and had something a little more substantial. But then they show me all the options: peanut butter, cinamoon, raisins and apple slices (The Sin-a-Sandwich); chunky peanut butter with pineapple slices, sliced banana and coconut (The Peanut Colada) and numerous others. Then you get to choose what kind of bread, what kind of peanut butter (they had like six different kinds) and what kind of jam or other spread (a dozen different choices). I felt like I was ordering a steak or something with all the instructions here. Prices ranged from $2 to $4, depending on how fancy you made your sammich. Ooh, and I also got three Oreo cookies as my choice of "side dish", packed into a tiny Chinese takeout-type box. Cool!

True, it wasn't what most of you might call a "nutritious" meal, and I'm sure it ruined whatever good I'd done at the gym this morning, but dammit, I guess I was just feeling Cerealicious today.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Heh Heh

(Thanks to Jay for this info)

(1) Go to Google
(2) Put "Cinzia Hart" in quotes under the search bar
(3) Check out the # 2 and #3 sites that show up (it's also number 2 on Yahoo.ca; I just checked)

Heh. Okay, so now the mystery is solved of why so many bloody people come looking here for information about her. But my question is, how on earth did people get here in the first place (before I'd ever mentioned her at all, as a joke or otherwise)? Weird.

Wrestling Movie Database

I would strongly encourage everyone to check out the new Wrestling Movie Database being compiled by our good friends Dave Hillhouse and Greg Oliver at Slam! Wrestling. It's already got quite the collection of wrestling-related films and some great reviews, and will only build over time.

And I swear I'm not plugging this just because one of my reviews appears on this....

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Latest (Retro) ITR

WCW Will Not Die!
The Canadian Bulldog has taken the day off. Funny, I didn't know Bulldog was a damned filthy hippie who considered 4/20 a holiday.... but whatever. Before departing for his Drum Circle, Bulldog did provide me with a fill-in column for this week. In another classic Retro ItR, Bulldog takes us back to that fateful week almost (ALMOST) exactly 10 years ago -- January 2000 -- when everybody in the wrestling industry agreed that WCW was never stronger after they got rid of those worthless Benoit-led "Radicalz." You can get Bulldog's bold and incisive analysis of the State of Wrestling from January 2000 in the latest all new (but also kinda old) Inside the Ropes.


Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Garbage Story

It's official: I HATE the Town of Markham's garbage-collection crew.

The backstory: Living across from a ravine, I have a serious raccoon problem, and like an idiot, I don't have a solid lock on my garage, so every night, no matter WHAT I have pressed up against the garage door (bricks, wood, MY CAR), the raccoons find a way in. I have no idea how, but as a result, there's always a stray garbage bag or two messed up. This has been going on for two years now.

Lately, though, I've been doing a LOT of cleaning of the house for various reasons, and we've stockpiled some SIXTEEN bags of garbage, plus whatever I've been able to stuff into actual garbage cans. Miraculously, the raccoons haven't been able to get in for the past two weeks or so (maybe they were full?), so I've been lucky in that respect.

Now, in my town, they have recycling and composting garbage picked up every week, and "other" garbage (eg my 16 bags full) picked up every other week. Last week, on Tuesday morning, I piled up all 16 bags outside to the curb before I left for work, confident that this was garbage week. Well, take a guess what happened? Wrong week.

My bad, I guess. So I stuff all 16 bags back in and again, the raccoons stayed away. So this Tuesday morning, I leave the bags out again. And so does everyone else on my street. I return at night, and EVERYTHING is still there (with the added bonus that the raccoons finally got to it and went to town on my collection, in particular). Why was there no garbage pickup? Well, I'm assuming that because Monday was a stat holiday (Easter Monday), the city decided to move the entire schedule back by one day. Fine, except.... THEY NEVER TOLD ANYONE! I checked our collection schedule, and it doesn't say anything on there. Also, the entire neighborhood had the same idea as I did, so it really wasn't my fault this time.

I got home and I was pissed. I wasn't about to cart all that garbage back in overnight, even if I did mean more raccoonage and garbage all over my lawn. At this point, I really don't care anymore.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Latest WWI Column

Introducing the WWE Hall of Fame, Animal Wing.

A special thanks to "The Big Rybowski" for his input!


Monday, April 17, 2006

New Hotmail Interface...

Ugh. Has anyone else tried this new "Live Windows Beta" thing that's replacing Hotmail? I think they're trying to look similar to Gmail, which is admirable, but its VERY clunky. I was thinking of sending them an email to say how much it sucks so far, but I can't even find the right button!

They still have the "classic" Hotmail view, which I've switched over to, but every time I log on, I first have to go through a front page message saying I'm "missing out" by not using the new program. Ehhh, I'll pass.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

New Slideshow!

I've just added this to my myspace.com profile, but just wanted to add this here as well. This is some of my favorite photoshopped/hand-drawn artwork from over the past three years.....

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Latest ITR

Wrestling God

John Bradshaw Layfield may have his cute little nickname... but coming up soon, Vince and Shane McMahon are going to be in a match where -- if you are a person of faith (though in this case, I'm not sure which "faith" applies) -- they will actually be in the ring Wrestling God. And they'll be wrestling Shawn Michaels, too; it's a tag match, you see. Even though the Man Upstairs has no doubt got his hands full, what with the Good Friday and Easter Sunday and all, he did take the time to conduct an interview with OO's OOwn Canadian Bulldog. You can check out the transcript, take a brand new Wrestling IQ Quiz, and hopefully still have time to repent before Easter in the new Inside the Ropes.


Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Latest TWS

The True Wrestling Story of Stone Cold Steve Austin


Monday, April 10, 2006

Movie Review - "Benchwarmers"

I wasn't sure I was going to like this one a whole lot. It had all the elements of a horribly-cliched sports comedy: not-so-lovable losers (David Spade, Jon Heder, Rob Schneider), a bunch of smart-ass kids (???) and a retired sports star making a shocking cameo (Reggie Jackson). Definitely something where I'd already seen the best clips in the commercial, or so I'd figured.

And yet the concept works. Sure, there are jokes that are real groaners, and I'm still waiting to see whether Heder has any other characters besides Napoleon Dynamite to show us, but for the most part, it was pretty light-hearted. I think the fact that they didn't try TOO HARD to gross people out helped as well.

Look, it's definitely not a "must-see", but its not without its charm. Nice tie-in to the start of baseball season to boot (my record for Jays games I attended this year: 1-1, as I saw Halladay's loss to the Rays yesterday).


Programming Notes

Well, I've got to be honest with you: the last month or so, I haven't been "feeling it" when writing ITR or TWS, or anything else for that matter. Some of them have been okay, but definitely not my finest work. Why? Lots of stuff going down that I'm not going to get into here, but its just drained me, creatively.

That said, both the True Wrestling Story (which should be on WWI tomorrow) and ITR (which I just finished writing now for publication on Thursday on OO) are both pretty decent, if I do say so myself. I'm still bummed out, but at least I'm able to look at both of the columns and chuckle a little. As always, let me know what you think......

Friday, April 07, 2006

Latest DVD Review

Blood Money

It appears as though Violence Sells. Not only has WWE done very well with an ECW DVD titled "Bloodsport," TNA has recently released a compilation DVD called "Best of the Bloodiest Brawls." With TNA poised to jump to a new Thursday night timeslot next week, the Canadian Bulldog decided the time was right to get up to speed on a few matches that TNA itself considers to be recent highlights. Mostly devoid of the X Division stylings that most equate with TNA, this video showcases more of TNA's main event stars doing their dirtiest deeds. And with mostly positive results. If the goal is to start winning fans over as TNA's profile on SpikeTV rises, Bulldog says this counts as a success in his latest ItR Video Review.

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Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Blue Jays Opening Game

Got (very good) tickets to last night's Blue Jays home opener against the Twins, and it was great to be back into baseball season again.

I know they were talking about "major improvements" at the Rogers Centre this year, but the only thing I could tell was different was fancy new names for the same old fast-food joints (oh, and they sell Philly cheesesteaks now). At least from the 100's level, I didn't notice anything all that new.

Before the game, they had tributes to both Kirby Puckett and Tom Cheek (the voice of the Blue Jays for most of the previous 29 seasons). Cheek's widow threw the opening pitch out to Ernie Whitt (my all time fave Jay).

The game itself was phenomenal -- a 6-3 win, with Roy Halladay going almost 8 innings. And although I hate to jinx things (just like I've done for the last decade or so), I really do think the acquisitions the team has made this year may take them pretty far. Yeah, way too soon for a comment like that, but whatever.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Latest WWI Column

Canadian Bulldog's Breaking News: MPAA Threatens to Strip Edge of "R" Rating


Monday, April 03, 2006

WrestleMania 22 Thoughts

I haven't really gone online yet to gauge reactions (and by I came home from the theatre last night, I was exhausted), so not sure what the general consensus was, but I thought this was a fun show. I went 8 for 11 in my predix (unfortunately, losing the final two which woun't help matters in the OO predictions battle, but whatevs).

Overall: Kane/Show vs Masters/Carlito was short and painless; legitimately surprised they didn't turn Carlito here... Money In The Bank was phenomenal, perhaps a step behind last year's, but still terrific... JBL vs Benoit was kind of a stinker. Not terrible, just not what I felt either guy was capable of... Mick Foley vs Edge was match of the night, with some tremendous work by both guys (and Lita, for that matter) in getting this over with the fans (and having Joey Styles on the stick for this one match was a nice touch) ... The backstage vignette with Booker, Sharmell, and The Assorted Freaks was hi-fricking-larious. It was spot-on perfect, especially with DiBiase's laugh coming out of nowhere at the end.... Booker vs Boogey was EXACTLY what I expected, not good nor bad either way, really.... Trish vs Mickie was well done, save for a botched move near the finish. I'm SHOCKED that Trish was getting the Cena treatment so heavily, but to his credit, The Rick has been calling this development for some time now.... Undertaker vs Henry could have been twenty-five seconds in length and STILL too long for my liking, but c'est la vie. The Tombstone WAS impressive... Michaels vs McMahon was a whole lot of fun. I kept getting this feeling that they'd somehow screw Michaels (about mid-way through the match), but they went for the obvious finish, which isn't a bad thing. For a minute there, I thought the trashcan was legitimately stuck on McMahon, and they'd need the jaws of life or something.... Angle vs Mysterio vs Orton underdelivered slightly, but they went with the right decision in the end. Wonder if maybe Michaels/McMahon went too long and they had to trim back... But of course, they COULDN'T trim back the next match (Candice-Torrie). No comment on that one, other than I can't believe THAT MATCH screwed up my predix so badly because of its placement on the card.... And finally, Cena vs HHH. I'll admit; I was REALLY surprised by the finish. My brother (part of the famed PPV Posse) was calling for this type of finish (a clean win by Cena to a chorus of boos), but I just didn't see it. When Cena won, my brother goes for high-fives all around, and all of us just have our jaws dropping on the floor. It's not a bad finish, necessarily, because it gives a lot of intrigue to tonight's Raw. It's just an ODD finish. That said, I'm VERY interested to see how they follow up on this tonight.

Overall, a very good WrestleMania and as I predicted, they overdelivered on what seemed like a weak card on paper.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

WrestleMania Predictions (Audio)

this is an audio post - click to play